We had a letter from an unexpected source. So we answered it. And they replied. For the full story, read the saga of...
DOMESDAY
THE NEW MILLENNIUM EXPERIENCE COMPANY 110 Buckingham Palace Road, London SW1W 9SB Tel: 0171 808 8200 Fax: 0171 808 8240 e-mail: nmec@dome.co.uk 1 April 1998 Dear Sir, You are no doubt aware of the nation's celebrations for the millennium, the centre piece of which is to be the Millennium Dome at Greenwich, on the bank of the River Thames. The New Millennium Experience Co. was established by Act of Parliament to articulate the desires of the nation regarding the way in which we are to celebrate the passing of the last 2,000 years of our history. Our patrons include the Prime Minister and we report directly to Cabinet Minister Peter Mandleson. In this way we are able to ensure that the project has support and guidance at the very highest levels of government. We are anxious to ensure that the Millennium Dome reflects every part and strata of our society, from the very top to the absolute bottom. And that is why we are writing to you. We would appreciate your ideas for exhibits and themes to display in the Dome, particularly those of a sporting nature. We are especially keen to have a section of the Football Arena on so-called 'fanzines' and the culture in which they appear to thrive. Our advisors tell us that this is an interesting sociological phenomenon that is now part of the life and fabric of our once great nation. As a fanzine editor we are sure that, occasionally, you will have some interesting ideas. Play your part in celebrating the millennium. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours sincerely, Deidre Wells, Implementation Manager Could we resist an invitation like this? Is Nick Berry an actor? But we couldn't just restrict ourselves to a football theme for a project this big. Nothing less than the history of the nation would do for us. Bearing in mind that despite all the effort and brainpower expended on it there's nothing to actually go inside the Dome, we tried to keep things simple. So, in the spirit of Disneyland come with us as we experience...
The HISTORY of MANKIND A VIRTUAL REALITY EXHIBITION for the MILLENNIUM DOME
Mankind evolved beneath the seas as primitive single cell organisms living on the sea bed. In our first exhibit we experience what it was like to exist in a thick, primeval soup where all you could see was absolutely... nothing! Moving on to our next room, you can see how the first living creatures emerged from the seas on to dry land at a time when the earth was covered in a dense cloud of sulphurous gas from the hundreds of active volcanoes on the still young planet. Please wear your gas masks as we move through the foul smelling murk where you can see... nothing! Mankind developed through the ancient civilisations of the Egyptians, the Greeks and the Romans. The latter unified much of Europe under the yolk of Rome, anticipating the formation of the EC by almost 2,000 years. After the Romans left, this country was plunged into the Dark Ages where Angles, Saxons, Jutes and Vikings wandered the land, plundering and pillaging until there was... nothing! Medieval society, with its carefully ordered hierarchical layers from Lords to serfs, gave way to the Industrial Revolution as Britain rang to the sound of hammer and forge, iron and coal. Poor people flocked from the countryside to the towns, only to find greater poverty in the new industrial cities like Manchester and Liverpool. Experience with us now what it was like in those times to have absolutely... nothing! Moving on to the present century, the country experienced some of the darkest moments in its entire history as Hitler's armies massed off the coasts of France and Nazi bombers blackened the skies overhead. See what it was like to live through a typical bombing raid, as we experience a total blackout in a typical 1940's air raid shelter, where we can see absolutely... nothing! And finally we can survey the whole Millennium experience in one thrilling and breathtaking vista as we reach the highest point of the Dome. And as we look out over the entire exhibition, across the empty rooms and acres of wasted space, we can see that we have experienced a whole load of absolutely... nothing!
Next, visit the Football Arena for... MORE THAN a GAME
More Than A Game, a walk through shrine to football, could be the flagship event in the Millennium Dome's Football Fantasy Arena. This interactive exhibition offers a unique view of football, exploring the beautiful game through state-of-the-art displays and celebrating it from the fans' point of view. More Than A Game takes you from the birth of the game with Sheffield FC in 1857 to the present. Appropriately, you enter through a turnstile having presented the correct money because no change will be available. Then via a players' tunnel you emerge onto a pitch accompanied by the roar of the crowd. Here a host of high tech displays brings the story of the world's most popular sport to life. Compare stark 1920's changing rooms with those of today and find out how stadia have been developed over the years. You'll here a pre-match pep talk from successful managers Kevin Keegan, Graham Taylor and Ruud Hullit and discover soccer's history in Germany, Brazil, China and the USA. Fans throughout England and clubs and players throughout the world have lent artefacts and memorabilia. There's a recreation of a fanzine editor's front room. See the piles of unsold fanzines, the litter of papers all over the floor, the discarded floppy discs and the magazines and newspapers left open in a desperate search for good ideas. Listen as his wife yells at him to get off the computer for at least five minutes and his kids ask when he'll be finished so they can play Doom or Lara Croft - Tomb Raider IV. You can become a TV commentator for an encounter between Alfreton Town and Radcliffe Borough. On display for the first time are Hollywood style handprints of the England squad when they played in the World Cup and fingerprints of the supporters who were routinely rounded up by the French police. There's classic football action on screen: Stoke City fans in action at a pitch invasion, England fans having a smashing time in Marseilles. In the Game in Crisis section, you can see how clubs cope with a condition of permanent insolvency. The Life and Times of Michael Owen gives you an insight into how to spend £50,000 a week - which luxury house and sports car to buy and whether it's better to have a Bentley and a Mercedes or a Rolls Royce and a BMW. David Beckham is on hand to talk about kick backs and his favourite Spice Girl and David Ginola takes us behind the scenes of his commercial for Loreal shampoo and shows you how to look like a complete prat as well as a big girl's blouse all at the same time. In the special outdoor activity area you can test your soccer skills using the images of eight internationals, visit the Smell-o-Rama and identify an array of football related aromas - hot pies, Bovril, wintergreen, used jockstraps, turf - then have your picture taken next to famous players at the photo-me booth. It's a great day out for all the family. Don't miss it. You don't have to be a football fan to like it!
And guess what sort of reply we got back. Yep, they didn't like it... THE NEW MILLENNIUM EXPERIENCE COMPANY 110 Buckingham Palace Road, London SW1W 9SB Tel: 0171 808 8200 Fax: 0171 808 8240 e-mail: nmec@dome.co.uk 26 July 1998 Dear Mr. Murphy, Thank you for your letter which was passed to me for reply. We have recently reviewed all the proposals we have received to date for the Millennium Experience. As you can imagine, we have received an enormous number of proposals, some of which included similar ideas to your own. I am sorry to tell you that your proposals were such that we felt unable to take them forward. I know this will come as a disappointment to you. However, I should like to thank you for your interest in the Millennium Experience. Yours sincerely, Deidre Wells, Implementation Manager Well thanks for nothing, Deidre. We put a lot of time and effort into that. We'll send you a copy of G'EB! anyway, just to show there's no hard feelings! Issue 036 - September 1998